


Promises of Yesterday

by shindouchrono



Category: Cardfight!! Vanguard
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M, Time Loop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-13 11:54:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15364083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shindouchrono/pseuds/shindouchrono
Summary: To defy "time" was to defy the rules of reality itself. To turn back the clock and carelessly jump from day to day, week to week-- he’d entered the hellish and unfair world referred to as “time”.Luckily, Kazuma is willing to do anything, anything, to get Chrono back.





	1. Paradigm

No, no, no! This can’t be happening, not again!

This was all he wanted. All he wanted was to be able to save Chrono from his fate.

Kazuma’s heart falls down in his chest. He failed again. And again! Over and over and _over!_ For once in his life, why couldn’t he do something right?!

Kazuma stares blankly down at his hands, mind blurring. It hurt, it hurt so much.

How many times was he going to need to replay this disgusting future?

The dark-haired male looks up at the Deity in front of him. Chrono sits, lifeless, in a throne. His eyes shine the same bright green they always do-- but they're dull. They're _empty._

Gyze, who had possessed Chrono looked like Chrono and sounded like Chrono, but was nothing like Chrono.

He’d do anything. Anything. Absolutely anything to get Chrono back. Who gave a damn if it hurt. For Chrono-- for that happy-go-lucky, swirly haired fool, Kazuma would go back as many times as it took and then some.

Kazuma raises his hand, pointing at Gyze.

“Just you wait, Gyze! I’ll defeat you, and I’ll get Chrono back! I won’t give up!”

 

* * *

 

That’s right. This was the choice he made. Kazuma turns away, turns his back on Chrono. This current timeline was a bust. There was no way he could save Chrono here. He had to go back. He had to try again. He squeezes his eyes shut, feeling as the surrounding area disappears into light.

Kazuma opens his eyes.

Blank, white space. It stretches out for infinity. Kazuma looks down at his hands, and sighs. The faint sound of metal echoes throughout the room, and Kazuma narrows his eyebrows.

The unit he’d gotten to know so well sits in the middle of the room.

“Chronojet,” Kazuma begins, taking a seat on the floor. A cushion appears underneath his folded legs as he sits. “I failed again. I’m sorry.”

Chronojet nods slowly.

Even though the dragon didn’t talk, Kazuma could understand what they were saying.

_It’s okay. We can go back once more._

“Yeah.” He replies, clenching his fists.

For who knows how long at this point-- Kazuma had been borrowing Chronojet’s power of “Time Leap” to go back in time. Right now, time was nothing to Kazuma. He had an unlimited resource of it, but felt as if he still didn’t have enough. Perhaps it would never be enough.

Each loop felt so short. He treasured the days when he could converse casually with Chrono, when he could smile and laugh without fear or worry. Those days were long gone, and each time Kazuma could only feel dread creeping up on him.

Each loop was slightly different.

Sometimes, Chrono got overtaken by Gyze quickly. Other times, it took months upon months. Those were the worst instances-- Kazuma always felt cheated. He seemed so close to succeeding, only to have that hope crushed and ripped away right before his eyes.

Kazuma stretches his hand out towards the ceiling. But it wasn’t a ceiling. It was an object that stopped, but continued on forever at the same time.

He turns his hand to examine his palm.

The first time he used Chronojet Dragon G’s Time Leap, a familiar symbol appeared on his left palm.

It almost reminded him of the Diffrider’s mark, but it was on the inside his palm instead of where it would be more visible.

The Gear Chronicle clan emblem.

At first, seeing it there reminded Kazuma too much of Kazumi, his brother.

Kazuma needs to go back again, but he’s drained right now. He wants nothing more than to sit in the same spot for a while. Close his eyes, take a nap. He shouldn’t, and he won’t-- no. More than anything else, he couldn’t.

Nothing felt more important than saving Chrono.

_I don’t disagree with you. But you need to take care of yourself, too. It’ll be much more difficult to save him if you ignore your health._

“I know that.” Kazuma frowns. “I know. I really do, but I…”

_Don’t think too much about it. Here, you can get your rest. This is an area outside of time. A place where both you and I can coexist._

“Outside of time… I’ve become something like an outlier, haven’t I?”

_Perhaps._

Kazuma forces out a bitter laugh.

_As one who doesn’t exist on a singular timeline, and one who’s been skipping over timelines like a rock on a pond, getting proper rest is harder for you. You may feel temporarily rested in your ‘real world’, but it would be nothing more than a light nap in comparison to this._

Leaning back, a bed materializes out of nowhere. Kazuma shuts his eyes, exhaling deeply.

He forces all of the painful thoughts and memories out of his mind. He focuses only on the good things, and when he too quickly runs out of those-- he starts to recite all the cards in his deck by grade. Their effect, their flavor text, their power level, their grades. Once he’s finished with that, he moves onto Taiyou’s deck. Then his brother’s. And then Chrono’s.

Halfway through the grade twos, Kazuma falls asleep.

 

* * *

 

“Kazuma?” A familiar voice calls.

For whatever reason, Kazuma’s chest aches upon hearing that voice. His brain is moving slowly, and he can’t seem to conjure up the energy to open his eyes. There’s a hand suddenly present on his shoulder, shaking him gently.

With a groan, he sits up.

“What? Can’t you see I’m napping-- oh.” Kazuma stops mid-sentence, heart pounding wildly at the sight in front of him.

Chrono tilts his head, raising an eyebrow.

He'd gone back enough times that the sight of Chrono shouldn't shake him to his core like this. But it did.

His heart pounded loudly in his chest. Kazuma, as always, wanted to rush forward and hug Chrono. He wanted to hold him tightly and never let go.

More than anything else, he wanted to bury his face in Chrono’s shoulder and breathe in his presence. God, it hurt. It hurt so unfathomably much.

“Kazuma?” Chrono asks, a concerned expression on his face. Same as it has been, Kazuma's heart lurches at the sight.

There were a lot of things the dark-haired male needed right now.

First and most important was to protect Chrono, no matter the cost.

Next was caffeine. After that was a sweater. Maybe a neck pillow! A hug would be nice, but a will to live would also be appreciated.

Kazuma distantly wonders if those last two were the same thing.

After that, food. Something warm.

Then, a nice, relaxing cardfight that didn't have the love of his life’s _life_ at stake, along with the fate of the whole world hanging in the balance.

Maybe this list needed to be reorganized.

Maybe Kazuma sucked at everything. _Especially_ lists.

Fuck ‘em.

“Kazuma?” Chrono asks again.

When he doesn't reply, Chrono gently places a hand on his forehead, frowning.

“What are you doing?”

Chrono has a look on his face as if Kazuma asked the dumbest question in the world. “I'm checking your temperature. You look pale, and you weren't answering me just now. Are you okay, Kazuma?”

 _No,_ he thinks. _I am the furthest thing from ‘okay’, but I can't tell you because the last time I did that, Gyze snatched you from right in front of my eyes._

“I'm fine. Just tired. Promise.” He flashes his best smooth, fake smile. Chrono seems convinced, but still worried.

Of course, that was normal. Kazuma knew this reaction.

“If you say so… but if you need anything, just call. I'll be at the register, okay?”

Kazuma nods as a response. He didn't have enough energy to lie again.

He knew he couldn't mess up and tell Chrono _again._ He'd done it too much already.

More specifically, it had happened around sixteen times. Each time Kazuma slipped up and revealed the truth, Chrono’s possession would be all the more painful.

Actually, it was if he slipped up and told _anyone._ He accidentally told Kazumi too many times, and those were absolute disasters. Having lost both his brother _and_ Chrono to crazed units from Cray was bad enough, but needing to see Kazumi watch _Kazuma_ fall apart? That was a path he’d prefer to avoid. It wasn't one that led anywhere, either. Just another dead end.

Kazuma accidentally told Taiyou once, too.

That was the worst timeline, without a doubt.

Kazuma squeezes his hand into a fist. His knuckles turn white with surprising speed.

That time, he told Taiyou the truth of what was happening. Of course, the youngest member of Striders tried to help, boldy making his way to the front lines once he thought he knew the future.

 _Stupidly_ making his way to the front lines.

Kazuma feels a wave of sickness as he remembers Taiyou’s cold body, laying on the ground. His deck was scattered everywhere. Gurguit had blown in the wind to rest on Taiyou's chest.

That wasn't supposed to happen. Sure, card games had the power to make and break relationships, to tear apart the universe, to connect two planets together-- but, why Taiyou?

Why did it have to be Taiyou?

Kazuma never, ever made that mistake again.

Everyone cried.

Chrono cried, and Kazuma couldn't remember a time _before_ all of this when he had seen Chrono cry like that, let alone cry at all, ever.

Maybe in the older videos of TRY3 that Kazuma had secretly watched, but no one needed to know about that. Nope.

The redhead had marched up to the remaining Apostle present and knocked him out.

Literally.

With his fists.

Kazuma knew too well how strong a punch from Chrono could be, but _seriously._ Gastille went flying.

...But those emotions got in the way. They made him susceptible to the Apostles’ trickery.

Normally, Kazuma wouldn't have said something like ‘emotions getting in the way,’ but…

Actually, he would have. That's how he used to be. Before he met Chrono.

When his life was still so grey.

Kazuma slumps over against the table. He wants to close his eyes for a little bit longer, but he needed to figure out how far back he had gone.

He reaches for his phone, squinting at the brightness of it. Scrambling to turn it down, he realizes.

Fuck.

There's only a week and a half until the common day before Chrono's possession. Sometimes, in rare occurrences, it would happen long before the loosely set date. But for the most part, the dates remained relatively consistent.

He thinks back to Chrono's hand, the one that was on Kazuma's forehead minutes ago.

Two more losses and he'd lose Chrono again.

Which timeline was this? How had everything went in this world?

A locked diary app. With shaky fingers, Kazuma enters his passcode.

0909.

He bites his lip. Maybe he should change it. It hurt to type sometimes. It was a weird form of self-deprecating motivation.

The password was set during the-- the what, the fifth loop? Something early on, back when he knew even _less_ what he was doing. Back when he would still get Time Sickness, or whatever it was called. There wouldn’t be a proper, official name, obviously-- just something Kazuma and Chronojet had come up with.

Time Sickness was an indescribable feeling.

You would feel sick, but not a sickness that medication, food, exercise, or even a good night's rest could cure. It was a sickness radiated in every part of your body-- it ached within every cell.

It ached like finding out a painful truth you already knew, but wanted to deny. The heart crushing emotion.

Shaky hands. Dizziness. Impaired vision. Dissociation was common, and welcome, sometimes. Your arms and legs weren't your own, nor were your organs, your blood-- every fiber of your being...

Chin in hand, the dark-haired boy sighs. To defy "time" was to defy the rules of reality itself. To turn back the clock and carelessly jump from day to day, week to week-- he’d entered the hellish and unfair world referred to as “time”.

Kazuma was just as desperate as the first time. The desperation was like a parched throat in the desert. A starving stomach nearing a buffet. That desperation kept him alive. It kept him sane.

Many of the beginning loops were scrambled and jumbled, the “Kazuma" of another timeline was carefully setting the stage, unbeknownst to himself. It was confusing. It was stressful. Loop by loop, he started to understand more.

During the 19th loop, Kazuma managed to push back the date of the possession by a full week.

168 hours.

10,080 minutes.

604,800 seconds.

That's when he first realized the “rules" of Time Leap.

Unlike in the actual game, there wasn't any particular “cost" he had to pay. No one went away-- well, maybe. But there was no bottom of the deck to return to. The majority of it was metaphorical.

...Perhaps there was a cost?

If anything, Kazuma paid the cost when he formed the contract with Chronojet.

Depending on how he played his cards, both metaphorically and literally, Kazuma would have more control over a future timeline. He could set up a world for one of his “other" selves. A majority of the timelines were set up by past, present, or future Kazumas.

Another Kazuma would start at a different point. Set it up.

Thus, the diary.

Wake up. Check the diary. Read the diary. Game plan, battle plan. It all had to be done in a short time. Kazuma was only pretending he knew what to do.

Rinse, repeat. Rinse, repeat. Rinse, repeat.

Rewind, rewind, rewind.

_An undeniable, inescapable failure._

Rewind, rewind, rewind…!

All the entries were filled with information. All the events of the past days, including every single relevant fight, plans, casual events, deck edits, etcetera. It was down to the very last detail.

Honestly, how it all worked still didn't make sense to Kazuma. But the fact remained that it _did_ work. He had established a system that made some sense, and even though he hadn't yet been successful how he wanted to-- it didn't mean Kazuma would _never_ succeed his goal.

Of course, there had been small victories. Kazuma would always try and remind himself that it wasn't all a failure.

Yeah, okay. It was an outright lie to himself, but Chronojet insisted on looking on the bright side in a pitch black world.

It helped.

He carefully reads through the information written.

Kazuma leans back in the chair, arm draped over the back of it.

Well… this wasn't the worst part to start from. It could absolutely be worse. It always could be worse.

He heaves a loud sigh.

Think positive, think positive.

Kazuma flips through the notes, stopping when he sees a page bookmarked. A bright red bookmark, an indicator of importance.

He whispers it out loud to himself.

“Ibuki’s arm is busted. Watch out, that incident always ends up with trouble. It'll be okay, though.”

If only he could believe that.

Kazuma thinks back to the numbers.

168 more hours with Chrono.

10,080 more minutes with Chrono.

604,800 more seconds with Chrono.

He bites his lip. Could he extend it? Could he change the stubbornly written future?

The fate of the Singularity-- Kazuma couldn't stand for it to remain like this. He _had_ to change it.

No.

No, that wasn't it. More than anything else--

He wanted to repay Chrono, no matter the cost. No matter the hardships, no matter the pain.

The future could be changed. It could be rewritten.

Kazuma looks over at Chrono, who’s engaged in an enthusiastic conversation with a customer.

He knew the future could change. He knew there was nothing set in stone.

Kazuma knew that, because Chrono himself had changed Kazuma's future, with that infectious grin, those sparkling green eyes, his stupid hair-- everything.

Chrono helped change Kazuma's future from broody and lonely; to a world so bright that sometimes, he felt like he needed to squint.

Gyze could never stand in their way.

No one could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this idea bouncing in my head for quite a while. I've seen a fair amount of people expanding on the plot of Z, and I wanted to expand my thoughts on it. I'm not the biggest fan of writing angst, but I felt compelled to share this-- and I hope you enjoy it, despite my initial hesitance.
> 
> This fic was in part inspired by a song from a show called "The Outs and Ins: A Study in the Ineffable", written by Jake Smith and sung by James Young. The song is titled "My Eyes", and the line for this particular chapter is "I couldn't recall how your gait had both grace and heft."
> 
> Thank you very much for reading!


	2. Limits of Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kazuma looks up, forcing himself to meet the eyes of that puppet. Gyze, who had possessed Chrono. Gyze, who looked like Chrono, talked like Chrono, but was nothing like Chrono.  
> The Shindou Chrono that Shouji Kazuma was in love with was nothing like the being standing in front of him. The smile on his face was nothing like the smile Kazuma knew. 
> 
> long chapter, so warnings for: dragon sass (no that's not a typo), implied sex scene, author's horrible, HORRIBLE jokes, brief emeto, and just general sadness but it's fine they get better

The clock on Kazuma's nightstand reads 3:56AM. He rubs the sleep out of his eyes. Honestly, even though he wanted to sleep, it was too difficult to close his eyes and actually sleep.

Thoughts rushed around in his head and kept him awake. Kazuma figured if he was going to be awake, he might as well look some things up.

Impatiently waiting for his browser to load, he taps his finger on his desk. He absentmindedly glances at a stack of papers.

Ah, yes. Homework.

The hidden benefits of time travel was only needing to do your homework once, so you could focus on the more important things; reasons to not do your homework.

Well, _he_ already did it.

“Butterfly effect…” Kazuma mumbles to himself, scrolling through the search engine’s results. He reads as much as he can, trying to fight off the sleep that tugged at his eyes.

Letting himself lay his head briefly on his desk, Kazuma’s eyes eventually flutter shut.

 

* * *

 

Kazuma’s eyes snap open, and he’s in a familiar place. Expectantly, he turns his head.

_You ought to lay down if you’re tired._

“Ah.” Kazuma realizes. He was tired enough to fall asleep at his desk, despite the fact he rested in this area only hours ago. “I didn’t realize I fell asleep.”

_Indeed. You must have gotten very into your research._

The dark-haired male nods, taking a seat on the chair that had materialized. “Yeah, I kind of lost myself there. The butterfly effect, though… isn’t that what I’ve been doing?”

_Yes, that’s correct. The butterfly effect… it has the power to cause natural disasters, and cause damage of immense proportions. If that butterfly had not flapped its wings at that exact point in space-time, that event may have not have happened._

Chronojet turns their head. A field of flowers appears. Dark blue butterflies float around the blossoms.

Tulips, Chrono’s favorite. Kazuma absentmindedly wondered how Chronojet knew that.

_Through our bond, I gained information that I would have not known otherwise, similar to how you gained Gear Chronicle’s ability to Time Leap._

“That makes sense.” Kazuma replies. He leans back in the chair, eyes flitting between the dragon and the field of flowers. “Would that make me the butterfly?”

_More or less._

He doesn’t respond, processing the information he’d been given. This “time” he was in right now, had been crafted through another “Kazuma’s” actions. How he adjusted the playing field would affect another timeline.

Kazuma was the butterfly flapping its wings, unaware of the damage it could cause by its mere existence. The lives it could ruin through a simple action.

“I don’t think I care very much for butterflies.”

Chronojet may not have the ability to emote, but Kazuma suddenly felt as if the unit was smiling at him.

_I suppose you prefer the moon?_

What--

Was this dragon _sassing_ Kazuma?

“If I didn’t know any better,” He begins, turning to face Chronojet. “I’d assume you were making fun of me.”

If Chronojet could smile, they would be. A smile with a teasing air. Like Vanguard, like avatar, because that was the same kind of expression on Chrono’s face when he--

Kazuma frowns.

How long had it been since Chrono made such a carefree expression? How long had it been since Chrono was able to truly, properly joke around? To smile?

It’d been a long time since Kazuma had been able to as well.

“It…” Kazuma trails off, not sure if can force out the words.

Of course, Chronojet could read Kazuma’s thoughts, but for some reason-- Kazuma felt he had to ask this out loud. Maybe it was for his own benefit, rather than the unit’s?

“It’ll be okay in the end, right?” He inhales. “We can do this...right?”

_Of course we can._

Kazuma nods, ignoring the doubt that nibbles away at his heart.

 

* * *

 

 

Everyday Chrono had a shift at Card Capital, Kazuma would be there. Was it paranoia? Yes, but in part, he wanted to be there. He needed to be.

Some days, Kazuma wouldn’t even fight anyone. He’d just fiddle on his phone, or resleeve his deck, maybe even read a book. Chrono had commented on it a couple times, but it didn’t discourage Kazuma from visiting.

Despite the abundance of time in his hands, it would always pass too quickly. He should be savoring the time he had, but with each loop it slipped through his fingers like sand.

Today was… Kazuma clenches his hand into a fist.

Today, Anjou Tokoha was going to lose to one of Gyze’s Apostles.

He didn't know which one, but every loop where Ibuki’s arm got injured was a quick descent to failure.

Like every other time, it was going to be in the middle of the night when everyone was asleep. Several times before, Chrono had woken up to his phone ringing and dashed over to where his former teammate was.

...And each time, Chrono would end up injured. Then when Gyze possessed him, there would always be a long moment of disgusted taunting from the Apostles, saying his pathetic it was that Kazuma wasn't able to _at least_ protect the vessel of Gyze’s body.

He grits his teeth. It was pathetic.

“Kazuma!” Chrono calls, apron in hand and grin on his face. “I'm off work. You wanna go get something to eat?”

He looks up. “Sure.”

Chrono’s eyes light up, and he smiles somehow wider and more beaming. “Alright! Where do you want to go?”

Kazuma stands. “Wherever is fine. I don’t have much of a preference.”

There’s suddenly a concerned pout on his boyfriend’s face, and Kazuma raises a brow. “Why are you making that face?”

“Are you sure? We’ve gone on dates where I’d pick and you would end complaining.”

The dark-haired male would laugh if he wasn’t so tired. What a Chrono-like thing to complain about, in a way that showed he was still concerned about what Kazuma wanted.

It was endearing, and Kazuma treasured Chrono for every expression he’d make, even when that face was a pout.

Well, and the pout was cute.

“Alright, then. Is the ramen place good for you?” Kazuma asks.

Grinning again, Chrono nods. “Fine by me! Let’s go, then.”

 

* * *

 

Kazuma fans himself with his hand. It was humid, and walking to a ramen shop really didn’t help feeling like he was suffocating. Chrono’s talking about something, something Kazuma can’t really focus on, but he wants to.

He wants to listen to Chrono’s voice while he spoke about trivial things. He wanted to just casually converse and laugh.

But he couldn’t.

Actually-- he couldn’t hear very well at all right now. For some reason, despite how close Chrono was, to Kazuma he sounded distant.

Kazuma turns his head, and everything starts to spin. Chrono’s face is getting blurry-- and his expression is changing to nervous.

_Don’t make that face,_ Kazuma wants to say. _I want to see you happy and smiling._

He wants to say this, but for some reason, his mouth won’t open. His vision goes black at the edges, and Chrono’s suddenly moving closer.

Kazuma loses consciousness.

 

* * *

 

The first thing he sees when he opens his eyes is Chrono’s worried expression. Kazuma looks up at the ceiling.

Oh, he’s at Chrono’s house.

“Kazuma! You’re awake.” Chrono looks relieved, and sighs. “I was so worried when you just passed out like that.”

Kazuma tries to sit up, but Chrono grabs onto his shoulder. “What are you doing? You _just_ passed out. Don't try and get up again right away!”

_Oh, shut up._ He wants to say. The irritation bubbles up. His head hurts. He’s tired, but he’s _fine_. He didn't need to lay back down.

“‘M fine.” He mumbles. Sitting up, the world spins.

Okay. Not fine.

“Stop pushing yourself, Kazuma! Have you looked in a mirror recently? You look tired.” Chrono places a gentle hand on Kazuma's shoulder.

“I'm fine.” Kazuma says again. “I'm not pushing myself.”

He was just doing what needed to be done.

“Babe, you passed out. On the ground. You can't tell me you're not pushing yourself. I was-- I was worried, Kazuma…” Chrono tightly grasps Kazuma's hand.

The dark-haired male notes that it's not the hand with the mark on it. Not really subtle, but maybe it wasn't on purpose.

“I'm sorry for worrying you. I am fine, though. Really.”

Chrono's brows are furrowed, and he doesn't look at all convinced. “You say that, but… You know you can talk to me, Kazuma. I don't know how much I can really do to help, though.” He scratches the back of his neck.

It wasn't Chrono who couldn’t do much to help. It was Kazuma's fault for failing.

“No.” He says, voice blunt and slightly cold. “You don't need to do anything. Just… trust me.”

Kazuma kisses Chrono's temple.

“It's hard if you don't tell me anything.”

“It's not that simple.”

_I can't lose you again._

Chrono tilts his head in the puppy-like way he does. “Why isn't it? Maybe it can be simpler. If you told me, maybe I could--”

“You don’t understand, Shindou!” Kazuma yells, balling his hands into fists. The intensity in his voice surprises even himself.

“Yes, I don’t.” Chrono’s frowning now. “How could I understand if you’re not going to tell me anything, Kazuma?!”

Kazuma slams his hand down on the desk next to him. The cards sitting there bounce up from the force of the punch. “Tell me, why would I ever tell you anything if I knew you weren’t going to believe me!”

_How could I ever tell you, if I knew you would leave me right after?!_

The redhead’s brows are furrowed and his eyes narrowed into a glare, and he leans forward. “How would you know if I’d believe you or not?! You can’t just make assumptions like that, Kazuma!”

Kazuma bites down so hard on his lip it bleeds. He can feel the blood dripping.

“I’ve done this before, Chrono!”

Chrono falls silent, jaw hanging open.

Kazuma can feel himself boiling with rage. Frustration, pity, disgust, jealousy, everything, every emotion all at once. It overwhelms him. He feels himself drowning in it all.

If he hadn’t lost himself to those feelings, maybe he would have noticed the concern in Chrono’s eyes, or the faint pink in his cheeks.

“I’ve had this same conversation before! So many times!” Kazuma knows he’s shouting. He knows he needs to be quieter, calmer. Screaming like this wasn’t going to do anyone any favors in the long run, least of all himself. But, for now, it might make him feel better.  “Nothing changes! Nothing will ever change! No matter what I do-- no matter what I do, I can’t save you! I can’t save you, Chrono!”

Fuck, fuck, _fuck!_

By saying this, he was ruining it. He was dooming this timeline. Kazuma was leading Chrono by the hand to his end. But he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t stop the feelings from exploding in his chest, pouring out his mouth.

Chrono grabs Kazuma by the collar and kisses him.

“What?” The dark haired male asks, jaw hanging open. His anger dispels, quickly replaced by confusion.

“Sorry, I--" Chrono clears his throat. “You looked like you needed a kiss.”

He was right. Kazuma _did_ need a kiss.Though he needed so much more than a kiss, Kazuma felt he shouldn't be picky.

Chrono knew Kazuma so well. It was just what he needed in that moment.

After that, the only thing that Kazuma could feel was the desire for more. He wanted to have Chrono move closer. Closer that it was stifling, like the humidity outside. Kazuma wanted to kiss Chrono again.

So he does.

He kisses Chrono until they're both panting and out of breath, and then Kazuma starts to unbutton Chrono's shirt until there's enough skin revealed to satisfy him.

Kazuma pulls the fabric aside so he can kiss Chrono's shoulders. There's a second of hesitance, but then he bites down.

“Ghh…!” Chrono winces, but he doesn't move away. In fact, he moves closer into Kazuma's touch.

He bites down, higher this time, on Chrono's neck. Kazuma sucks at the soft skin until he knows there's a bruise.

Deity of Destruction be damned, because right now, in this moment-- Shindou Chrono was Shouji Kazuma’s. And for as long as this loop lasted, Kazuma was going to make damn well sure everyone knew.

“Is this okay?” Kazuma asks, voice low and quiet.

“Yes.” Chrono replies, no hesitation.

Kazuma feels relieved, and bites again. At this point, it was going to look like Chrono got attacked by a bear.

But it wasn't a bear.

Just an overprotective boyfriend, willing to do anything for a world where Chrono could live.

For right now, Kazuma would indulge.

“But when all of this is over, Kazuma," Chrono pauses to shut his eyes, letting out a quiet moan as his boyfriend leaves another bruise. “You'll explain everything to me, right?”

“Yes.”

Chrono smiles.

“Do you promise?”

Kazuma can feel hope brewing in his chest. He smiles back. “I promise. Once this is all over, and I've won, I’ll tell you everything.”

The urge to cry overtakes Kazuma, and he bites his lip. It all felt so unfair. Chrono must have noticed the change in expression, because he reaches out to caress Kazuma’s cheek.

“Kazuma… um, what do you, uh…” Chrono's expression flattens. His face suddenly gets redder.

Oh, god. He was going to tell a joke, and judging by that expression-- it was going to be absolutely terrible.

Chrono clears his throat. “What do you ask your partner who plays Gear Chronicle if they wanna get--" He pauses to laugh. At his own joke. “If they wanna get _Gear Groovy_ with it?”

Kazuma shakes his head. “That's awful.” But he can't help but smile. Chrono's still laughing, hard enough that Kazuma is almost concerned the redhead won't be able to finish his own joke.

“I don't know. What do you ask, Shindou?”

“‘Babe, are you Chronotimer Leghorny?’” Just like that, Chrono absolutely _loses_ himself with laughter. Despite the atrocity of the joke, Kazuma laughs too. Maybe because it was actually kind of funny, or maybe because Chrono's laughter-- and smile, were contagious.

“That's _horrible._ ” Kazuma eventually says, once they're both done laughing. He shuts his eyes, letting his face rest in the crook of Chrono's neck. He kisses the bruised skin. “Still, though… are you trying to drop a hint?”

“Maybe,” Chrono replies, smiling softly. “But I'd never ask like that.”

“Oh?” Kazuma asks, lifting himself up just enough to stare into Chrono's eyes. “How would you ask?”

He leans in, kissing Kazuma. “Like this.”

 

* * *

 

 

In the middle of the night, when Chrono's asleep, Kazuma unplugs his boyfriend’s phone. A steely expression remains on his face. Chrono's phone is at 10%, which meant it would die within the next thirty minutes, and it took hours to charge. So Chrono wouldn't see the inevitable message from Tokoha until an hour or two after he woke up.

The redhead doesn't stir, and for that Kazuma feels grateful.

The clock reads 2:47AM, which meant there was about thirty minutes to an hour until Tokoha was going to lose her fight. Kazuma stands up from the crouched position he was in on the ground, looking over at Chrono's sleeping figure. Part of the blanket had fallen off his boyfriend when Kazuma got up.

Purple and red love bites were all over Chrono's neck and shoulders.

Good.

For now, that was enough of a reward. That and Chrono's peaceful sleeping face, which admittedly made Kazuma feel a little bit creepy for watching.

He crawls back in bed and shuts his eyes.

Sleep doesn't come quickly, but it does eventually.

 

* * *

 

 

The next time Kazuma sees Chrono, the redhead still has the buttons of his shirt done all the way up. Pride swells in Kazuma's heart.

Of course, that pride doesn’t last long.

Two nights ago, Tokoha lost her fight against Gastille. Which meant there were only a couple days left.

Maybe even less than that. “A couple days” was just wishful thinking.

Kazuma glances over at Chrono, who’s staring intently down at the back of his hand. A murky worry sits in his stomach.

“Are you okay?” He asks, gentle as possible.

Chrono lifts his head, looking like he’d been snapped out of a trance. “I… I don’t know. I have this weird feeling.”

The worry only gets bigger at those words. Kazuma reaches out to hold Chrono’s hand. He kisses the back of Chrono’s hand, right where the mark of Gyze is.

“I’m sure it’ll be okay.” Kazuma lies. The apprehension wraps around his heart.

Nothing was going to be okay.

It wasn’t, it wasn’t, it wasn’t.

Everything was going to end here, and Kazuma knew it. There were so many timelines similar to this one. Chrono was digging his own grave by saying he had a “weird feeling.”

It’s Kazuma’s fault for not trying hard enough. For slipping up and telling Chrono in a moment of weakness. He bites his lip. Kazuma sped up the ending.

He fucked it all up again.

Chrono’s phone starts ringing, and Kazuma wants to throw up.

His boyfriend’s face goes flat. “Tokoha is calling me…”

_No..._

Kazuma knew it was already too late.

“Tokoha?” Chrono puts the phone up to his ear. Kazuma doesn’t need to strain his ears. He doesn’t even need to listen to know what happens next. He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to hear Tokoha's tearful and terrified voice, one that sounded guilty enough to make Kazuma want to vomit.

“What?! Ibuki-- Ibuki lost?” He sounds shocked. “No, I feel fine. It clearly hasn't happened yet.”

_Oh, but it will._

Kazuma can't get the will to look up at Chrono's expression. He didn't need to anymore.

“Yeah, he's with me. I'll text you. Okay. _Okay_. See ya.” The redhead stares down at his phone. Kazuma breaks the silence.

“...The mark on your hand.” Of course, he didn't need to look to know.

Haha!

They had mere minutes left together, and that's what Kazuma had managed to say? What a joke.

Chrono looks at the back of his hand. All the requirements have been fulfilled. He looks pale all of a sudden. Kazuma so desperately wished for the energy for anything other than an apathetic acceptance.

So he moves closer, and hugs Chrono tight.

“I'm sorry," He says, voice cracking. “I'm sorry this had to happen again. I'm sorry I failed you again.”

“Kazuma, you…” Chrono glances upwards into Kazuma's eyes, and his gaze softens. “This whole time, you were… I had no idea. I'm sorry too, Kazuma.”

How did he figure out? How did he know?

Well… it was Chrono, after all. Was this the first time he had found out? How many loops had it been, for this to be the first time he'd ever heard those words?

“You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I do, though.” The light in Chrono's eyes is slowly fading. “I'm sorry you had to take on this burden all alone.”

Despite the numbness, Kazuma knows there are tears running down his cheek as he grips Chrono tightly.

He wants to force something out. To tell Chrono it would be okay, he’ll try again. To tell him that it wouldn't hurt. To tell him, one last time…

_“I love you.”_

Chrono goes limp in Kazuma's arms. Having been through this so many times, the time traveller doesn't need to turn around to know who-- _what_ was behind him.

“I won't let you take Chrono.”

A gentle laugh. “How precious of you to think you have a choice in the matter.”

Those goddamn cocky units. Kazuma turns his head, but the unit is already too close.

It’s already too late.

Gredora hits Kazuma over the head with something heavy. He loses consciousness.

 

* * *

 

 

Kazuma jerks upright, looking around. Everything is blurry, and he’s dizzy. He tries to stand, memories filling in quickly. “Where is he?”

“Kazuma,” Kazumi says, resting a hand on Kazuma’s shoulder. “You need to rest.”

“No!” He replies, gritting his teeth. He didn’t want to rest. Sure, he was on the verge of throwing a child-like tantrum, but he needed to find Chrono. Gredora took Chrono--

His head pounds, and he reaches up to touch it. Feels like there’s bandages.

“Kazuma-san…” Taiyou says, quietly.

A familiar voice clears his throat.

Ibuki.

His hand is in a cast, and he has a bruise on his cheek. Jesus, who did that?

Taiyou catches Kazuma staring at the bruise, and looks away with what seems like a guilty expression.

No fucking way. How did Taiyou even _reach?_

Wait, no. There were more important things to focus on. Kazuma could think about Taiyou smacking Ibuki hard enough to bruise him later.

Kazuma sighs. “Okay. Tell me what happened while I was out. The last thing I remember was-- was…” He squeezes his eyes shut. Kazumi’s hand is still on his shoulder, and Kazuma sighs. “The last thing I remember is Gredora taking Shindou. After that, she hit me upside the head.”

Taiyou and Kazumi share a look. Both seem hesitant, and that hesitance worries Kazuma.

Ibuki cleans his throat again, hand that isn’t injured shoved into his pocket. “Several days have passed since then.”

Eyes widening, Kazuma shakes his head. Sure, he’d gotten injured before during a loop, but never had he remained unconscious for more than seven hours at most, including sleep. Several _days?_ How many was several? What about the Zeroth Dragons?

His head spins with all the questions. Kazuma’s brain feels crowded. He takes a deep breath, and moves so his legs touch the ground. This time, because he’s going slowly, Kazumi doesn’t try and stop Kazuma.

“How long has it been? How many days exactly? What about the Zeroth Dragons?”

It felt silly to ask about the Zeroth Dragons, because Kazuma felt he knew the answer well enough already.

“Four days.” His brother says, speaking slow and cautious. “As for the Zeroth Dragons…”

Taiyou speaks up. “Chrono-san-- no, Gyze got them. Kamui-san and I tried our hardest to stop them, but... I’m sorry, Kazuma-san.”

Kazuma looks down at the ground, inhales, and stands. “You don’t-- argh-- no, Kazumi, I’m fine. You don’t need to apologize, Taiyou. It’s not your fault.”

He can tell that Taiyou wants to protest, but doesn’t. The poor kid must have protested and apologized a million times over already.

“Do you have the security footage?” Kazuma asks. Ibuki pauses and then nods, and moving to grab a brown bag sitting on one of the tables in the hospital room. He steels himself as the video begins to play.

The sound is muted, but it wasn’t like Kazuma really needed to hear what they had to say, since he already knew. He’d been where they kept the Zeroth Dragons before, and he’d lost to the Apostles in that same place.

Gyze walks forward, absolutely no hesitation in his steps. Kazuma had always thought Chrono walked without hesitation, but Chrono was considerate at the very least. The redhead always had a sort of casual vibe, one that didn’t make Kazuma feel on edge, except for certain situations.

Speaking of certain situations, Kazuma notices something he’d never seen before. He carefully examines Gyze as he walks.

In each loop, the outfit Gyze put Chrono in remained consistent. The bottom half of Chrono’s clothes consisted of black loafers, shorts with six golden buttons, and black thigh high socks. It always made Kazuma feel awkward to look at, but he figured Gyze dressed Chrono in that way to emphasize the control he had.

Chrono, at this point, was nothing more than a well-dressed puppet in a play revolving around Gyze and the Apostles.

The role of everyone else was simple: an extra.

The rest of the clothes were a white dress shirt with most of the top buttons undone, uncharacteristic for Chrono. He would always button them all the way, or keep them all up except for the button at the collar. Kazuma used to tease him about it, back before all of this had started.

The last item of the ensemble was a black coat. It went down to just above Chrono’s knees, and had half sleeves. On the right arm of the coat was Gyze’s mark. On the left, however, there was the Gear Chronicle clan symbol.

Seriously. What a sick joke.

It was like Gyze was rubbing Chrono’s fate in his face-- and by extension, Kazuma’s. The clan symbol served as a reminder that Chrono was indeed the “Gear Chronicle Singularity”.

Kazuma breaks himself out of his thoughts, and focuses on the video. It shows Chrono fighting Taiyou. It’s not a fun match to spectate. It’s painful, but it’s almost relieving that Kazuma knows the outcome. That way he didn’t need to sit on the edge of his seat.

But the thing that caught his attention, because the buttons on Chrono’s shirt were undone, were the red and purple bruises Kazuma had left were still visible.

He didn’t know how to hold back the emotions he felt upon seeing those.

Embarrassment, shame, disgust… _Pride._

There were at least five on Chrono’s collarbones, and there had to be over double on his neck and chest. Only the collarbone and neck ones were visible, but Kazuma’s focus is quickly lost.

In the video, Taiyou damage checks, his hands shaking. Kazuma’s heart feels like it’s being ripped directly out of his chest with a pair of tweezers, snipping slowly and painfully to successfully pull it out.

Gyze looks up into the camera, green eyes as empty as always. There was no change in expression. He raises his arm, and there’s what looks to be a rainbow aura surrounding Chrono.

The video cuts out.

No one says anything, and the hospital room is quiet enough to hear a pin drop. There’s a gentle knock on the door.

Kazuma takes a quick glance around the room. “Come in.”

Strawberry blonde hair is the first thing that comes into view, and then the familiar facial features of Shindou Mikuru are what’s next. She walks in, quickly making her way up to Kazuma.

“Mikuru-san, I…” Kazuma starts, wanting to apologize. But Mikuru cuts him off with a tight hug.

She’s crying softly. “I’m so glad you’re alright, Kazuma-kun. I don’t know what I’d do with myself if you ended up getting hurt, too.”

“I--” He didn’t know whether to correct her or not. She probably saw the bandage on his forehead already. But it was more likely she was talking about Kazuma being himself. “I’m… I’m sorry, Mikuru-san.”

The room is still quiet. Even though the room is crowded, Kazuma can’t fight off the tears that fall down his cheeks. It’s embarrassing, but at least Ibuki looks away out of what Kazuma hoped was respect for privacy.

Through his blurry vision, Kazuma can see that Taiyou is crying, too. Kazumi pulls the younger boy into a hug.

“I’m,” Kazuma’s voice cracks. “I’m so sorry. I’m so, so, _so_ sorry. I’m sorry.”

 

* * *

 

 

The sun has begun to set. Taiyou went home, and Kazumi insisted he help the youngest member of team Striders home. Kazuma knew his brother was doing it in part for Kazuma’s state of mind, which he appreciated.

Mikuru just left, taking care to hug Kazuma at least thirty times before she did.

Ibuki stares out the hospital window. The air in the room is stifling, tension thick enough for a knife to slice clean through.

“We need some sort of plan if we're going to defeat Gyze.” The dark haired male eventually says. He takes a quick glance at his deck that sits on the table by his bed.

“That’s right. But there’s something we need to discuss first.” Ibuki’s eyes narrow. “You’re too composed.”

Is this how he talked to Taiyou? If so, it’s not a surprise he got decked in the face. Hell, Kazuma didn’t feel like he could hold back if Ibuki kept going on like that.

“Excuse me?” Kazuma glares over at the other man. “What, would you prefer I keep crying? Wallow on the ground in pity?”

“Don’t act like that. What I meant was--”

Clicking his tongue, Kazuma crosses his arms and turns away. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Ibuki’s suddenly at Kazuma’s bedside. “Explain. You asked how many days it had been. You asked for the security footage. How could you have known about the footage if you had been passed out in a hospital bed?”

It wasn’t the first time Ibuki had figured something was up, but honestly? He didn’t feel like dealing with it right now.

Kazuma rolls his eyes. “Are you suspecting me?”

Ibuki grabs his collar and Kazuma’s world spins.

“Shindou Chrono has been taken by Gyze. The Zeroth Dragons are with the Apostles.” Ibuki has a cold look in his eyes. “I’m not taking any risks.”

There’s three Ibukis, and Kazuma struggles to grab the wrist of whichever one was grabbing him. “Let go of me, old man.”

“I’ll let go when you explain in a way that’s satisfactory.”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I did.”

Ibuki’s chilling glare hasn’t changed. “We have nothing left to lose.”

Well, he wasn’t wrong.

“I’ve done this before. I’ve done it time and time and time again.” Kazuma flips over his palm, revealing the symbol there. “Not diffridden.”

Ibuki was right. Kazuma grins.

There really was nothing left to lose.

The white-haired man lets go of Kazuma’s shirt, finally. “You…” He begins, opening his mouth. He shuts it, looking like he’s processing what’s been said.

“If I had to estimate it, I’d say it’s been over three hundred times I’ve repeated this same situation. I’ve lost Shindou more times than I’m sure _you_ could count.” Kazuma still has a grin on his face. A sick smile. “I’ve seen each and every one of us be utterly devastated by the Apostles. This isn’t the first time your arm has been broken, you know.”

“I’ve seen loops where you got murdered by Gastille. Times where my brother had even been killed. I watched Chrono mourn over Taiyou’s corpse.” He can’t seem to stop talking. “I’ve been using Chronojet Dragon’s Time Leap ability. The first time-- the very first loop, right after we all lost to Gyze… Everything suddenly went white.”

Kazuma takes a shuddering breath.

“Chrono stretched his hand out to me. It wasn’t Gyze. It was _Chrono._ He stretched his hand out, like he always would, with that same smile on his face. I grabbed his hand, and suddenly I was somewhere else. I turned around, and there Chronojet was. They told me I could go back. That…” When did his body start shaking? “...That I could have another chance to save him.”

How long had it been since he’d told this story?

“So I tried again. And I failed again. I mourned. The third loop was the first time I watched someone die. The older Anjou. Right in front of our eyes.” Kazuma lets out an empty laugh. “You screamed. But Anjou was the last loss they-- the Apostles needed. I didn’t even bother fighting. I went back again. And again, and again, and again.”

Tears drip on the hospital bed.

“I kept trying! I kept trying, and I kept failing, again and again!” It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. “All I’ve wanted to do, this whole time-- was to repay him. I wanted to be able to save him like he saved me. I wanted to be the hero that he was to me. I wanted to do something for him. But, I still… I still…!”

Ibuki places his hand on Kazuma’s shoulder.

“It’s okay.”

Kazuma looks up, confused.

“It’s okay. You’ve done a good job.”

A… good job? But he hadn’t… he hadn’t succeeded. They just lost Chrono. All the Zeroth Dragons were gone, too. Ibuki’s arm, Kazuma’s head-- they were both badly injured.

“He’d complain if he knew the lengths you went to.” Ibuki says, bluntly, interrupting Kazuma’s confused thoughts.

Kazuma finds himself laughing. “He would.”

“But,” He hesitates before continuing, choosing to stare out the window. The stars glimmer and shine. “I’m sure he’d be happy that you care about him so much.”

Kazuma doesn’t know how to respond. Most of his day had been spent crying, so why was he still crying now? Why were there silent tears slipping down his cheeks? How were there still tears left to cry?

Despite those tears, he smiled. He smiled and felt something tugging at his heart. Something he had never felt during all these loops.

Happiness.

Kazuma felt _understood._

When he finally looks up, he sees a shine in Ibuki’s eyes. The familiar shine of tears.

“Let’s save him.” Ibuki says.

He smiles, something that felt carefree. “Yeah. We’ll save Chrono, and then later… We can listen to him yell at us for being so reckless and getting injured for his sake.”

 

* * *

 

 

The next days pass by in a flash. Kazuma can't retain it. Maybe it was the overuse of Time Leap. Maybe it was how unbelievable what had just happened.

Ibuki and Kazuma made a powerful team. Kazuma with the “Time Leap” ability and Ibuki’s natural disposition. They started to make plans. They figured out locations.

Just like that, Kazuma was standing face to face with the throne he’d seen so many times before.

The lifeless doll in that throne wordlessly stands. The bruises have faded into a light yellow, a distant memory of that moment alone with Chrono.

Kazuma grits his teeth.

Past loops flash before of his eyes.

Kazuma looks up, forcing himself to meet the eyes of that puppet. Gyze, who had possessed Chrono. Gyze, who looked like Chrono, talked like Chrono, but was nothing like Chrono.

The Shindou Chrono that Shouji Kazuma was in love with was nothing like the being standing in front of him. The smile on his face was nothing like the smile Kazuma knew.

“Chrono.” He says. Gyze tilts his head, acknowledging that Kazuma spoke. “I’m going to get you back.”

A laugh. “It’s not the first time you’ve said that. It won’t be the last, will it? You want to keep trying to save _your_ dear, dear Singularity?”

Gyze was speaking so sweetly. Sweet enough that it made Kazuma want to vomit.

“Yeah. It’s not the first time I’ve said this. But before, I didn’t believe it. I didn’t believe that I could defeat you, Gyze. I never believed in myself. My whole life, I never even thought I could move forward from where I stood. That I would always remain as nothing but a failure.”

He clenches his deck in shaking hands. “I thought that. But Chrono-- Chrono taught me I was wrong. He believed in me.”

“Chrono’s not here right now.” The deity taunts, shrugging Chrono’s shoulders. “Should I leave a message?”

“Don’t bother. I’ll tell him myself.”

The field materializes in front of them. A table that wasn’t there seconds ago appears.

“The power of the Singularity. The power of one referred to as the ‘Peacemaker’, the one who connected Cray and Earth… All of this is his fault, you know? He was the one who enabled this to happen. Shouldn’t you resent him for such a thing?” Shutting his eyes, Gyze places his starting Vanguard on the table. “He’s the one at fault. But he said he believed in you, so it’s all okay, isn’t it! But, _Kazuma!_ ” Gyze says, in Chrono’s voice. He laughs, voice high and airy. “You’ve failed. You’ve failed again and again! If I didn’t need this body, maybe I’d just kill it right in front of you! What makes you think you can win?”

Kazuma narrows his eyes. “I’ve already said it, haven’t I? A long time ago. Chrono believed in me. He believed in what I could become. He believed in my potential. This whole time, I wanted to repay him. I wanted to show him what he showed me. It was my own fault for not realizing it. I’d never been able to succeed before, because I never really thought I could. But this time is different.”

Gyze’s grin widens, cat-like and hostile. “We’ll see about that. Stand up, Z--!”

“Stand up!” Kazuma flips over his starting Vanguard.

_“Vanguard!”_

 

* * *

 

Everything spins. Kazuma’s hands shake. Everything comes into focus. He looks down at the table he’s standing at. Luard looks back at him. He put his hand of only four cards after his quadruple drive check with Dragstrider on the table.

His opponent’s damage is at six. Technically more than six. Gyze had guarded for three to pass, and Kazuma pulled four critical triggers.

Four.

For the first time, fate was on his side.

How much damage was that? Nine? No, ten. Dragstrider gets another critical through his skill. Kazuma wants to laugh. He wants to collapse on the ground.

To fight Gyze, and to win… Kazuma had never done that before. He looks across the table, suddenly realizing what was happening.

Chrono is losing his balance. Kazuma runs, ignoring the pain in his body and the distance between Chrono and himself. He'd never been much of a runner, but hey, there's a first time for everything.

There was a first time for winning against Gyze, after all.

He catches Chrono, but the weight throws them both on the ground.

“Yo.” Kazuma greets. Chrono slowly opens his eyes. Bright green. The sparkle is back in his eyes.

“Kazuma…?” He asks, voice shaking.

Honestly, Kazuma thought he could make it through this moment without crying. But that was stupid on his part. “Y-Yeah?” Tears flow freely down his cheeks. He's so happy. He's so, so, so happy.

Chrono smiles.

Ah, god. His smile.

“Thank you.” His voice was warm. It made Kazuma feel warm and soft inside. Chrono pulls Kazuma close to kiss him.

“Chrono!” A voice shouts, coming closer. Tokoha and Shion. Honestly, how were they not here earlier?

“Shion? Tokoha?” Chrono tries to sit up, but can't on his own. Kazuma supports him. “Thanks, Kazuma.”

This _‘thanks’_ was so much more casual than the last. It filled Kazuma with a sense of blissful relief.

Kazuma suddenly remembers those words Chrono said, right before he lost himself. His cheeks flush, and he leans in close. “I love you too.”

Chrono looks like he’s processing the words, and his face turns pink. Did he not realize what he had said back then? “I… didn’t realize I actually said that.”

The dark haired male laughs. “You can be embarrassed about it later. For now…”

“Chrono!!” Tokoha screams, going down on her knees to hug Chrono. Shion does the same. Even though he doesn’t want to, Kazuma backs away so the three can embrace.

“Chrono-san!” Taiyou calls. Tears are running down his face as he gets closer. “You’re-- you’re okay!” He’s on his knees too, so relieved he falls. Kazuma pulls him in for a hug.

Finally. He did it.

 

* * *

 

The hospital room was finally less crowded. Mikuru had excused herself to grab a drink of water, but Kazuma felt that wasn’t the actual reason. Chrono probably knew that, too.

Kazuma sits on the bed, pulling Chrono into his lap. A comfortable silence settles in between the two.

With his chin buried in Kazuma’s neck, his mumble isn’t audible.

“What did you say?” He asks, opening one eye to look at his boyfriend. There’s a distant look on his face. “Shindou?”

“I said thanks.” Chrono says. His cheeks are a bit red, but he’s looking at Kazuma with tender eyes. “I don’t really know how much effort you put in. I don’t even know what really happened.”

Chrono takes a side glance at his deck.

“I don’t know. But I kind of feel I do, at least a little. Can you tell me now, Kazuma? What you went through? You haven’t forgotten you’d tell me, right?”

Kazuma sighs, but he’s smiling. “Geez. You’re not even out of the hospital yet.”

“Well, if I pass out from shock then it’s better you tell me here, right?” A carefree grin. Chrono kisses Kazuma on the cheek. “Oh, but first…”

“Don’t worry me like that.” The dark haired male moves into the warmth of the kiss. “What’s up?”

This time, Chrono is really blushing. “Um… about what I said.”

Raising a brow, Kazuma tries to make eye contact with Chrono, who looks away. “What do you mean? You say a lot of things, babe.”

With a playful smack on Kazuma’s shoulder, Chrono takes a deep breath. “I-- I meant what I said. That… That I loved you. Hold on! Hold on, don’t say anything, because I know you want to. Just wait for a second.”

Kazuma does.

“When I first met you, which I’m sure is longer for you than it is for me, I thought you were such a jerk. A cute jerk, but still a jerk with a smart mouth. During our first fight when you just started to get going… I think that was when I fell in love with you.”

Great. Now Kazuma’s blushing too.

“I looked at you, and maybe I was just projecting parts of myself, but I felt like maybe how you were then, and how I used to be were kind of similar. I couldn’t help but meddle. How you didn’t believe in yourself, and how you weren’t even remotely able to see anything you were capable of… It made me upset you couldn’t see what was obvious to me. I started to get to know you better, and all sorts of things have happened. We formed a team, you punched me and I punched you back… Taiyou made us eat that spicy curry.” The redhead snorts at the memory. “I got possessed…”

“I, uh,” Chrono scratches the back of his neck. “I’m not really good at talking about how I feel. Obviously. Honestly, I think I’d feel better if we could talk about this while cardfighting. But I wanted to be able to tell you, honestly, how I really felt. So, um… I’ll say it again, but this time I won’t get possessed seconds after, okay?”

“Okay.”

Chrono takes a deep breath. “Kazuma, I… I’m in love with you. I love you. I love you so much.” He clutches Kazuma’s shirt. There are tears in his eyes, and his shoulders lightly shake.

“I love you too. I love you so, so much.”

Their lips touch, and Kazuma touches the back of Chrono’s neck. His boyfriend pulls away, cheeks flushed.

“That reminds me. That outfit I was in… it showed everything, didn’t it?”

Kazuma smirks. “Yup. You weren't really yourself, though. I can give you some more to show off, if you’d like.”

Chrono laughs, music to Kazuma’s ears. “If the nurses won’t kill me, sure. And Mikuru is going to be back any second, and I really don’t want her to walk in on that.”

“Pfft, that’s fine, then. We have all the time in the world now, don’t we?” Kazuma kisses Chrono again.

“Yeah. We do.”

They hold hands. “But… I want to listen, Kazuma. To what you’ve been through.”

He quietly nods, pressing a kiss on the back of Chrono’s palm. “Okay.”

So he shares. He shares everything from the very first loop, to the times where Kazuma would see people die, to the times where Kazuma would be on the brink of death himself. He tells Chrono about all the other Chronos. He admits about the phone password and the diary.

“Zero nine zero nine… Isn’t that…?”

Kazuma clears his throat, embarrassed. “Your birthday. Yeah. I know. You don’t need to mention it. It was, I guess… motivation.”

Chrono smiles. “Thank you, Kazuma. For working so hard for my sake. Thank you.”

His eyes burn from crying so much, but Kazuma felt happy enough to cry again. “It’s… my pleasure, Chrono.”

 

* * *

 

 

Kazuma was a bit reluctant to leave, but visiting hours didn’t last forever, despite how badly he wanted them to. He makes his way home, body feeling impossibly light.

Walking into his room felt completely different. Every single sight felt new. Everything was suddenly so much brighter. It was like when...

Kazuma’s face flushes, despite being alone in his room.

It was like when he first met Chrono.

He locks the door, sliding down onto the floor. Exhaustion comes in waves, and he sighs. Then he laughs. And then he outright cheers.

Soon enough, that exhaustion is too much to bare. He can’t even find the energy to change into pajamas. Kazuma flops face first onto his bed, and falls asleep. He doesn’t notice his deck box slip off the desk. The cards inside fall and fly everywhere, scattered onto the floor.

Most importantly, Kazuma was too deep asleep to notice the sudden burning on his palm...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for radio silence! This chapter is like, 7000 words so hopefully it makes up for that. 
> 
> Also, a note on The Joke In The Fic: I'm so sorry and I need you to know I told the joke to my partner/who also edits my fics and they 1) turned all the way away from me 2) got up and left, and then in the car the next day I told them I was going to put that joke into the fic. They asked how on earth I was going to do that and how it would even remotely fit. I put it in anyways. Chaotic evil fic writer.
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Everything is good now! Ibuki and Kazuma had a moment! Chrono and Kazuma confessed to each other! Gyze has been defeated! 
> 
> But... the story isn't over quite yet.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, my Twitter is @shindouchrono, so if you'd like to come talk to me about my AU, Vanguard, or just in general--feel free to! I'd love to talk to you. Thank you very much for reading, and if you enjoyed, please leave a kudo or a comment! Have a lovely day! :D


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